Home at the ICU
It’s difficult for me to even write these words: Maddie is going back into surgery tomorrow morning. The cardiac team feels that her heart can no longer handle staying in the junctional (JET) rhythm. Her body just can’t seem to resolve it on its own. They’ve decided to go forward with implanting a permanent pacemaker.
Normally, this would involve placing the device in an incision below the breast, but since she has just had open heart surgery and her sternum is not yet fully healed they can re-break it and do a more thorough job of placing the leads with an open chest cavity. This process will make the connection more stable in her body. The device will be placed behind her abdominal muscles.
But the words “re-break the sternum…” They are just too harsh to accept right now. My heart hurts for this little girl who was just beginning to heal. I can’t bear the thought of her going through the nausea, the pain, the anger, the fatigue all over again as she recovers from the anesthesia and surgery.
The risk involved is lower than the last two procedures. I don’t worry as much about mortality. It’s her emotional well-being I fear will suffer. It’s the thought of her sinking into a depression again that made me cry at this news.
Again we are going forward in faith. Again we are asking for prayers and positive energy. Again we are putting our trust in God’s hands, hoping that He knows what’s best for this precious little girl.